Something Special

These moments of doubts are absolutely the worst. Letting it completely consume, I hate that. It was almost about to happen, I was letting it happen. I really didn’t want to wake up today,  about to let it go and just sleep. But I pushed myself to get up, take a shower, make some tea, and meditate. Yes I did cry. Meditating calms me down, it forces me to put all those doubts away, let them slip from my mind. So crying didn’t last long. It’s super weird how I stop myself from being myself. The doubts, the worries, the fears. Just letting myself waste away. All these cool thoughts and ideas I have, will I ever let them fully come out. If not to share with others, at least for myself. Can I push myself for myself. I guess when I start and think I’m on the right track, it’s always for the wrong reasons. Because I always stop. There’s never a true continuation, like there was a break. No, it’s a stop, like I quit. I was really ready to quit. But I didn’t allow it to take over. I know that wouldn’t go over well, not for myself and especially not for the people that love me. Just to give up because I am wasting time doing nothing for nothing. That’s sad and that’s what I become. I keep pushing myself out of it though, so there has to be something special that’s going to happen at some point.

NotYourAverageGirl

-Rhodesia

Edible

via Daily Prompt: Edible

For a while, or a long time I have consumed.

Forever consuming and assuming it was okay.

Not realizing it was poison.

Poison in an edible form.

Believing it was healthy,

consuming semi blindly.

I saw it,

it looked alright,

harmless. (or so I thought)

Not realizing what it was doing.

I consumed just to be filled,

just to feel,

just to touch,

just to feel something.

Just thinking it was satisfying a hunger,

a temporary fill.

I didn’t know.

It was in my being,

I fed it to myself.

It came in an edible form though

How was I supposed to know.

I consumed it,

It consumed me.

After a while I did see.

really

I saw

Looked in it’s eyes

I saw it’s truth

which wasn’t

what I thought it was

whom I expected

why I consumed

Edible, it was not truly edible

please inspect everything thoroughly before you consume

 

NotYourAverageGirl

-Rhodesia

 

Thanks for reading 🙂 ❤

Concert VLOG | Kehlani | SweetSexySavage | May 20th 2017

Hi 🙂 I hope you’re having a great and beautiful day
I went to see Kehlani live last Saturday with my friend April.
It was great !
Her opening acts, Jahkoy and Ella Mai were soooo good and of course Noodles.

She always has the best opening acts, so check out their music as well.

—————————————————————-
Jahkoy’s Soundcloud-
https://soundcloud.com/jahkoy

Ella Mai’s Soundcloud-
https://soundcloud.com/itsellamai

Noodles’ Soundcloud-
https://soundcloud.com/wicvh

Kehlani’s Soundcloud-
https://soundcloud.com/kehlanimusic

——————————————————————-

Intro Music: Goody Goody by Ambré (Super Miles Remix)
https://soundcloud.com/supermiles/ambre-goodie-goodie-super-miles-remix

Outro Music: Bankroll by Ambré [Ura Remix]
https://soundcloud.com/ambremusic/bankroll-ura-remix

 

Enjoy 🙂

Happiness Meter Low

Lately there has been a lot of overwhelming sadness at least once a week. Tears, silent weeping, loud weeping (if I’m alone). I am not happy. Constantly trying though. I keep trying to keep going and keep doing. Especially with me trying to keep my job. I have to push myself almost everyday just to get ready for work. I want to be alone, but then at the same time I don’t want to be alone. There’s tons of activities that I enjoy doing, like writing or taking and editing photos to share on my blog. But if I’m not in the mood to be motivated in life, those activities don’t get indulged in. Continuously getting sadder. Just sleeping my life away. But, here I am writing something again, me pushing myself to do something I like to do. It’s actually making me feel better. If I keep pushing myself to do one activity that I enjoy daily, the motivation for life, will continue to increase.

Thanks for reading 🙂

NotYourAverageGirl

-Rhodesia

Panicked Moments

via Daily Prompt: Panicked

Past tense of Panic.

I’ve done it,

A lot.

About a lot,

Over a  lot.

Panicked moments,

my seemingly short life

contains plenty

of those.

Why, what for?

Hearts beating fast,

Of fear?

Of nervousness?

Of anxiety?

All in this life we live.

Sometimes,

the Panicked moments matter.

Sometimes,

they don’t.

Sometimes overreactions.

Sometimes necessary.

Needed, not needed.

But I guess those moments matter,

In the grand scheme of our lives.

A few of the small details,

In our big pictures.

 

NotYourAverageGirl

-Rhodesia

Moxie Flair Creations

Recently, maybe like a month ago or so, I started an Etsy. Brainstorming for a shop name was not as easy as I thought. It took me a while to find these two words and put them together. But once I did put them together, they felt right. These two words define what I am going for with my creations, who I am as a person, and how I aspire to be in life. Moxie Flair.

Moxie- a force of character, determination, or nerve.
Flair- stylishness, and originality.

All of my items are handmade. I would definitely say that my items are a reflection of my style. I am just hoping that others will like and enjoy my items just as much as I do.

Click MoxieFlairCreations to check out my Etsy.

NotYourAverageGirl

-Rhodesia

Thanks for Reading

Create a website or blog at WordPress.com

Up ↑